ProfileMarianne and Jill's Wedd...PhotosBlogLists Tools Help

Blog


    December 10

    threat to same-sex marriage rights Canada defeated

    Vote closes same-sex marriage issue, PM says
    Tory motion would have reopened debate on rights of gays to wed
    By JENNIFER DITCHBURN The Canadian Press

    OTTAWA — The last major threat to same-sex marriage rights in Canada was soundly defeated in the House of Commons on Thursday, with MPs sending the message they don’t want to revisit the emotional, divisive debate.

    Prime Minister Stephen Harper said he heard the message and will respect it.

    "We made a promise to have a free vote on this issue, we kept that promise, and obviously the vote was decisive and obviously we’ll accept the democratic result of the people’s representatives," Harper said. "I don’t see reopening this question in the future."

    The question put to MPs was whether they wanted to see legislation drafted to reinstate the traditional definition of marriage, while respecting the existing marriages of gays and lesbians.

    That Conservative motion failed 175-123.

    In the tense Commons, MPs watched each other carefully to see how the other would vote. Some Liberals cheered as prominent Tories voted to let sleeping dogs lie. Some Conservatives applauded Liberals who did the opposite.

    Ultimately, more MPs supported same-sex marriage than in the last vote on the issue in June 2005.

    During that charged vote last year, only three Tories voted in favour of expanding the definition of marriage. On Thursday, the number who approved the status quo was 13, including high-profile politicians such as Foreign Affairs Minister Peter MacKay, Transport Minister Lawrence Cannon and International Development Minister Josee Verner.

    Said Cannon: "The file is finished. We’re turning the page."

    On the Liberal side, the number of MPs committed to going back to the traditional definition of marriage dropped from 32 to 13. MP Joe Comuzzi, who lost a ministerial post the last time around for refusing to toe the cabinet line, voted against Thursday’s motion.

    Bloc Quebecois Leader Gilles Duceppe, who himself had two MPs snub party discipline Thursday by not voting at all, said he imagined the result was precisely what the Conservative government was hoping for.

    "I think it’s over now. I’m pretty sure that Mr. Harper is also pleased with what happened," Duceppe said.

    In fact, many Tories had said privately —and publicly — over the last few months that they wanted to get past the same-sex marriage issue and have it done with before the next election.

    Tory MP Bill Casey said the vote came as a relief. Casey also went from supporting traditional marriage to wanting to have the matter closed.

    "If the vote had gone the other way, we would have spent the next several years with this as the main motivator here ... so I just voted to move on," Casey said.

    But some politicians were questioning whether the Conservatives had something else up their sleeve. Some reports had said the government was poised to introduce legislation to protect Canadians who did not want to perform gay marriages for religious reasons.

    Justice Minister Vic Toews and Harper said that wasn’t in the cards, for the time being.

    "The government has no plans in that regard," Harper said. "If there were any time in the future when fundamental freedoms were threatened, of course the government would respond to protect them. The government has no plans at this time."

    The House of Commons has been dealing with the issue of same-sex marriage in earnest since 2003, when the Ontario Court of Appeal ruled that barring same-sex couples from marriage was unconstitutional.

    Gays and lesbians began marrying in the province, and soon other jurisdictions faced similar rulings and began issuing licences.

    About 12,000 gay Canadians, as well as foreign visitors, have been married in the last three years.

    The previous Liberal government took the further step of consulting the Supreme Court on whether its own legislation would infringe upon freedom of religion. The court responded that the Charter would protect churches from having to officiate such marriages.

    Laurie Arron of Canadians for Equal Marriage celebrated the decision.

    "It’s quite clear that after three votes in three years in three different parliaments that this issue is settled," Arron said. "It’s quite clear there is a growing consensus among Canadians the equal marriage is here to stay."

    Meanwhile, REAL Women of Canada, a socially conservative lobby group in favour of traditional marriage, said they would push for a national referendum on the issue.

    "Elitist political leaders apparently believe that Canada is still in the twentieth century, where political parties ignored the opinion of the voting public," the group said in a release.

    "Arrogant political leaders do not, in fact, know what’s best for everyone."

    November 01

    Our Amazing Wedding

    To write something about our amazing wedding is kind of hard!  As much as I enjoy writing this is just so close to my heart it's like sharing my secrets.  I could write about all the funny moments easily enough, but the true touching moments, which I'll never forget are hard to put down on paper.

     

    I never felt nervous.  My mind was perfectly clear.  I was completely steady. I was more than I ever wanted; it really was an amazing wedding!

     

    It was pouring rain outside as we watched from the high windows, seeing our friends rush into the church, there were so many cars, and so many umbrellas!

     

    The moms' went in first, the three of them.  M's two, her father's wife Ruth who has been in her life for 30 yrs, and her Mother Carol, and my mom Morlene.  They, which I missed, linked arms and walked down the isle together signaling that the brides were ready.  This unity was amazing!  And was more than Marianne had ever hoped for, we thank-you, moms'!

     

    We lined up in the hall of that beautiful church.  Autumn first with her basket of leaves, Charlie with the ring pillow, my best man Robin, and my brother in full uniform had me on his arm.  Behind me was Kaitlynn, our eldest daughter, and then Marianne's best man August, and then Marianne was waiting, standing between her two Dads.  I peeked behind to see if she was there, ok... as they had kept us apart the last few moments before the ceremony.  She smiled that smile that melts me every time and I knew we were really, ready.

     

    Jim, my brother, cracks a joke to relax me, he says, "You look beautiful Jill, want to marry me? No?  Ok..."  It was all I needed to grin.  Soon we heard our pianist playing our march and walked forward.  The photographer helped me find just the right position for my bouquet, which I absolutely loved!  The flowers were the perfect fall colors, oranges and burgundies.

     

    I was totally happy I walked in, the slow walk smiling at our guests, and then caught the eye of some out-of-town guests I wasn't expecting and melted a bit.  Jim dropped me off at the front, and I waited for M....  I watched Kaitlynn come down, and then August who looked quite emotional himself, and finally there was my M.  I totally cried.  I just let the tears roll as I hugged both her fathers and took my soon to be bride by the hand, and led her up the little red carpeted stairs.

     

    Teri our Rev, welcomed everyone and got right down to business.  We choose a reading from the book of Ruth.

     

    But Ruth pleaded with Naomi, "Don’t urge me to leave you or turn back from you" (Ruth 1:16).  "Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me"

    It was perfect, and really how I feel.  I will never leave her side, unless she chases me away with a stick, her family has completely adopted me, and we have blended both families and traditions.  The part about God.. Well.. That's always been my attitude about my lesbianism; I fear nothing when M is by my side.

    October 31

    Our Vows

     

     

     

     

    "I love you and I promise to always be there for you.

    I respect your independence and I encourage your growth.

    I promise to receive your love with love

    and to work hard

    at keeping our marriage true and everlasting."

    Marianne's Dance with her Dads'

    MY GIRL (Temptations)

    I've got sunshine on a cloudy day.
    When it's cold outside I've got the month of May.
    I guess you'd say
    What can make me feel this way?
    My girl (my girl, my girl)
    Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).

    I've got so much honey the bees envy me.
    I've got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees.
    I guess you'd say
    What can make me feel this way?
    My girl (my girl, my girl)
    Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).

    Hey hey hey
    Hey hey hey
    Ooooh.

    I don't need no money, fortune, or fame.
    I've got all the riches baby one man can claim.
    I guess you'd say
    What can make me feel this way?
    My girl (my girl, my girl)
    Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).

    I've got sunshine on a cloudy day
    with my girl.
    I've even got the month of May
    with my girl (fade)

    Our Wedding song, and my favorite moment!

    At Last

    by Etta James

    album: Her Best (1997)

    Artist : Etta James 
    Song : At Last (1961)
    Album : Her Best 
    
    At last 
    My love has come along
    My lonely days are over
    And life is like a song
    
    Ohh yeah yeah
    At last
    
    The skies above are blue
    My heart was wrapped up in clover
    The night I looked at you
    
    I found a dream, that I could speak to
    A dream that I can call my own
    I found a thrill to press my cheek to
    A thrill that I have never known
    
    Ohh  yeah yeah?
    You smiled, you smiled
    
    Oh and then the spell was cast
    And here we are in heaven
    for you are mine....
    
    At Last
    October 30

    Our Wedding Plans

    Getting Married
    Getting Married magnify
    Gettin' Married!
     
    Marianne and Jill met Spring of 2003 but didn't begin dating til' a questionable date in the fall somewhere between mid Oct (as M says) and near the end of Nov (as Jill says). Even thought here might be a bit of a debate as to when.. it deffinately happened! The two hit it off and soon were zipping off to Disneyland (Jan).. and moving in together (June).. which included the blending of their families, three children, two of Jill's and one of Marianne's.  They have gone through so much in such little time!
     
    "Now that I know who I am, I have my own business, I know how to operate a drill, light a BBQ and I'm learning to drive.  Coming out of the closet was such a complex, difficult step for me, as it effected so many people around me, especially my children, but so worth it. I have never been so happy and felt such an inner peace in my entire life, nothing can get me down."
     
    HOW WE MET

    Our best friend August introduced us, early spring of 2003. We were both seeing someone else at the time but there was an instant attraction.. that had to lay dormant for some time. August brought Marianne over to Jill's. With cheese cake. "I was still going through transition I didn't know where I was supposed to be. And there she was, this extremely beautiful woman who knew who she was and knew where she was going, I was very impressed. That and she pet my dog!" Marianne and Jill  began seeing each other fall of 2003!

     
    THE ENGAGEMENT

    Jill was married once before, to a man of all things so she had to get that divorce finished off before she could propose to Marianne, finally that came through July of 2005 and she set her sights on marrying M. They had been living together for a year and it was a great year. Not that they had never had a squabble.. they just figured them out decently. They took a family trip to Cranbrook, visiting some relitives of Jill's and finally had a moments peace to look at some rings. They picked a beautiful one out together and a few weeks later we set a date, Oct 28, 2006! To mark the date, Jill sent Marianne and beautiful bouquet of flowers of Red roses, & white lillies.

     
     
    "And hand in hand on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon The moon, The moon. They danced by the light of the moon. "
    The Owl and the Pussycat
     
    THE WEDDING
     
    Marianne and Jill will be married October 28 2006, 7:00 PM at St Andrew 's United Church, 1000 Huckvale Pl, we are having our reception at the Elks hall.  Both places are conviently located in town.  We will have our friends and families with us and will throw a huge masquerade ball following the evening cerimony.
     
    "I just feel like I'm setting everything that was so wrong, right.  Making this profound commitment to Marianne is a big part of that."